フレンズ シーズン1-6 音読用スクリプト (シーズン1-6全スクリプト)
There’s Joey’s picture! This is so exciting! You can always spot someone who’s never seen one of his plays before. Notice, no fear, no sense of impending doom. We came on the wrong night. I can’t believe I forgot to bring a magazine. This might be good. The exclamation point in the title scares me. It’s not just Freud, it’s Freud! Magic is about to happen. I feel violated. Did anybody else feel they just wanted to peel the skin off their body, to have something else to do? Feels like two. There’s a beautiful woman at eight, nine, ten o’clock! She’s amazing! She makes the women that I dream about look like short, fat, bald men! Go over to her! She’s not with anyone. What would my opening line be? She’s a person, you can do it! Could she be more out of my league? Back me up here. He could never get a woman like that in a million years. You always see these really beautiful women with these really nothing guys, you could be one of those guys. You could do that! I can’t believe I’m even considering this. I’m very very aware of my tongue. Stand back everyone, incoming ego shrapnel. I can do this! Here goes. What I didn’t say was what I was about to say, what I wanted to say was would you like to go out with me sometime. You’re in a play! I didn’t know you could dance! You had a beard! Whadja think? It wasn’t that bad. It was better than that thing I did with the trolls, at least you got to see my head. She said yes! Awful play, man. Whoah. Her name’s Aurora, and she’s Italian, and she pronounces my name ‘Chand-lrr’. I think I like it better that way. The usher gave me this to give to you. What is it? The Estelle Leonard Talent Agency. An agency left me its card! Maybe they wanna sign me! Based on this play? Look it’s a note on the back! “Loved your work, call me asap.” She was obviously very moved. And you should probably call her very fairly quickly. Come in! I’m here to see Estelle Leonard Just a moment let me see if she’s in. I know you weren’t expecting some one so fantastically beautiful. Take a load off already darling. Sit! I can’t tell you how excited I am just to even be here. Why not?! You don’t mind if I eat while we talk, do ya? Sweetheart let me ask you a question. Did you ever see the movie Sleepless In Seattle? You represent those actors? No! You know at the end of the movie the part where they’re all so happy with each other? That’s going to be you and me. You want to sign me? No I want to go up on top of the Empire State Building and make out! Of course, I wanna sign you! I don’t see it! Try to look past the book. You just have to un-focus your eyes. Who’s focusing? There’s nothing to focus on! Where’s the Statue of Liberty? Right there! God, I can’t not see it now. Come here. Do you see anything right here? Yeah, looks like a boat. Right there in front of the Statue of Liberty. Well, I can’t believe I’ve been here almost seven seconds and you haven’t asked me how my date went. How was your date. It was unbelievable. I’ve never met anyone like her. She’s had the most amazing life! She was in the Israeli army. Luckily none of the bullets hit the engine block. So, we made it to the border. I’ve been talking about myself all night long. What about you? Tell me one of your stories. Once I got on the subway, and it was at night, and I rode it all the way to Brooklyn… just for the hell of it. We talked ‘til like two. It was this perfect evening more or less. All of a sudden we realized we were in Yemon. I’m sorry, so ‘we’ is? ‘We’ would be me and Rick. Who’s Rick? My husband. You’re divorced? You’re widowed? I’m still married. So tell me, how do you think your husband would feel about you sitting here with me? Sliding your foot so far up my pant leg you can count the change in my pocket? I imagine he’d be okay with you because really, he’s okay with Ethan. There’s an Ethan? Ethan is my boyfriend. So explain something to me here, what kind of a relationship do you imagine us having if you already have a husband and a boyfriend? I suppose mainly sexual. I’m sorry it didn’t work out. What ‘not work out’? I’m seeing her again on Thursday. Didn’t you listen to the story? This is twisted! How could you get involved with a woman like this? I had some trouble with it at first too, but the way I look at it is, I get all the good stuff: all the fun, all the talking, all the sex; and none of the responsibility. This is every guy’s fantasy! That is not true. You guys don’t mind going out with someone else who’s going out with someone else? I couldn’t do it. Good for you. When I’m with a woman, I need to know that I’m going out with more people than she is. One time I went out with a guy who had just gotten divorced. And it was really hard. His kids liked me better than him. What does this have to do with Chandler’s thing? I didn’t have anything on that topic. So I went another way. Monogamy can be a tricky concept. Now you’ll never know. There’s a theory, put forth by Richard Leakey- Are we greeting each other this way now? ‘Cause I like that. I cleaned! I did the windows, I did the floors. I even used all the attachments on the vacuum, except that little round one with the bristles, I don’t know what that’s for. Nobody knows. And we’re not supposed to ask. I see you moved the green ottoman. How did that happen? I thought it looked better there. It’s an extra seat around the coffee table. It’s interesting. But y’know what? Just for fun, let’s see what it looked like in the old spot. Alright, just to compare. Let’s see. Well, it looks good there too. Let’s just leave it there for a while. I can’t believe you tried to move the green ottoman. Thank God you didn’t try to fan out the magazines. She’ll scratch your eyes right out. I am not that bad! You are, Monica. Remember when I lived with you? When we were kids, yours was the only Raggedy Ann doll that wasn’t raggedy! I’m responsible, I’m organized. But I can be a kook. Try to imagine this. The phone bill arrives, but you don’t pay it right away. Why not? Because you’re a kook! Instead you wait until they send you a notice. I could do that. You let me go grocery shopping. No problem! I’m not done yet! And I buy laundry detergent, but it’s not the one with the easy-pour spout. Why would someone do that? One might wonder. I would be fine with that. Someone’s left a glass on the coffee table. There’s no coaster. It’s a cold drink, it’s a hot day. Little beads of condensation are inching their way closer and closer to the surface of the wood. STOP IT!! It’s true! Who am I? I’ll be there! That was my agent. My agent has just gotten me a job in the new Al Pacino movie! Can you believe this? Al Pacino! This guy’s the reason I became an actor! “I’m out of order? You’re out of order! This whole courtroom’s out of order!” Just when I thought I was out, they pull me back in! Seriously, what’s the part? I’m his butt double. I play Al Pacino’s butt. He goes into the shower, and then I’m his butt. This is a real movie, and Al Pacino’s in it, and that’s big! You deserve this, after all your years of struggling, you’ve finally been able to crack your way into show business. Make jokes, I don’t care! This is a big break for me! You gonna invite us all to the big opening? I need to borrow some moisturizer. For what? Today’s the big day! Have you got tweezers? I think I have a rogue hair. Go into the bathroom, use whatever you want, just don’t ever tell me what you did in there. Where’s Joey? His mom’s on the phone. He’s in the bathroom. I don’t think you wanna go in there! We’re roommates! My eyes!! I warned you. Who is being loud? That would be Monica. I wanna borrow a couple of things, Aurora spent the night, I really wanna make her breakfast. You got the whole night? I only have twenty minutes until Ethan. Do I sense a little bit of resentment? No resentment, believe me, it’s worth it. In a relationship you have these key moments that you’ll remember for the rest of your life? Every- single second is like that with Aurora. I’ve just wasted about thirty-five of them talking to you people. Can you help me with the door? The old Monica would remind you to scrub that Teflon pan with a plastic brush. But I’m not gonna do that. Could you see if they could warm it up in here? I’m a little concerned about goose bumps. Everybody ready? I just wanna thank you for this great opportunity. Look I mean, listen, I know this is just a first step but I hope this. Lose the robe. That would work. The robe is lost. We’d like to get this in one take. Let’s roll it.. water’s working.. and… action. Hey, Butt Guy, what the hell are you doing? I’m showering. That was clenching. The way I see it, the guy’s upset here. His wife’s dead, his brother’s missing. I think his butt would be angry here. I think his butt would like to get this shot before lunch. Once again, rolling… water working… and action….and cut. What was that? I was going for quiet desperation. But if you have to ask. I love these fingers… I meant my fingers. Look at ‘em, look at how happy they are. Too bad, she’s leaving. I’m sorry. He’ll be waiting for me. I thought you talked to Rick. Ethan? He got to spend the whole day with you! It’s Andrew. I know there’ll be many moments in the years to come when I’ll regret asking the following question, but- And Andrew is? He’s new. What you’re saying is you’re not completely fulfilled by Rick, Ethan and myself? That’s not exactly what I was. Most women would kill for three guys like us. So what do you want? Lose the other guys. All of them? We’re great together, why not? Why can’t we just have what we have now? Why can’t we just talk, and laugh, and make love, without feeling obligated to one another. Up until tonight I thought that’s what you wanted too. Part of me wants that, but it’s like I’m two guys. One guy’s going ‘Shut up! This is great!’ But there’s this other guy. Actually it’s the same guy that wells up every time that Grinch’s heart grows three sizes and breaks that measuring device. He’s saying ‘This is too hard! Get out!’ Which one of the two guys will you listen to? I have to listen to both of them, they don’t exactly let each other finish. Call me if you change your mind. The first guy runs the lips. Look at it this way: you dumped her. This woman was unbelievably sexy, and beautiful, intelligent, unattainable… Tell me why you did this again? Aren’t you the guy that plays the butt in the new Al Pacino movie? Nope. What happened. I got fired. They said I acted too much with it. I told everybody about this! Now everybody’s gonna go to the theatre, expecting to see me. No-one is gonna be able to tell. My mom will. Something so sweet and disturbing about that. I’ve done nothing but crappy plays for six years. And I finally get my shot, and I blow it! Maybe this wasn’t your shot. I think when it’s your shot, you know it’s your shot. Did it feel like your shot? Hard to tell, I was naked. I don’t think this was your shot. I don’t even think you just get one shot. I really believe big things are gonna happen for you, I do! You’ve gotta just keep thinking about the day that some kid is gonna run up to his friends and go ‘I got the part! I’m gonna be Joey Tribbiani’s ass!’. That’s so nice! I’m gonna go to bed. You gonna leave your shoes out here? Just casually strewn about in that reckless haphazard manner? Doesn’t matter, I’ll get ‘em tomorrow. Or not. Whenever. She is a kook. If it bothers you that much, just go out and get the shoes. No. Don’t do this. This is stupid! I don’t have to prove anything, I’m gonna go get them. But then everyone will know. Unless I get them, and then wake up really early and put them back! I need help!