フレンズ シーズン1-7 音読用スクリプト (シーズン1-7全スクリプト)
Central Perk is proud to present the music of Miss Phoebe Buffay. I want to start with a song thats about that moment when you suddenly realize what life is all about. Here we go. This is so cool, you guys. The entire city is blacked out! Mom says it’s all of Manhattan, parts of Brooklyn and Queens, and they have no idea when it’s coming back on. Who am I gonna meet in a blackout? Power company guys? Eligible looters? Could we talk about this later? Can I borrow the phone? I want to call my apartment and check on my grandma. What’s my number? I never call me. It’s her..that Victoria’s Secret model. Something Goodacre. She’s right, it’s Jill. I am trapped in an ATM vestibule with Jill Goodacre! Is it a vestibule? Maybe it’s an atrium. That is the part to focus on, you idiot! I’m just stuck at the bank, in an ATM vestibule. Jill says vestibule… I’m going with vestibule. I’m not alone… I don’t know, some guy. Hey Jill, I saw you with some guy last night. Yes, he was some guy. Officiating at tonight’s blackout is Rabbi Tribbiani. Chandler’s old roommate was Jewish, and these are the only candles we have. Ugly Naked Guy lit a bunch of candles. That had to hurt! It’s been fourteen and a half minutes and you still have not said one word. Do something. Just make contact, smile! There you go! You’re definitely scaring her. You’re tripping. Dexter’s a dog. The blackout is scaring him. You’d pee in dad’s shoes too if you didn’t know what was going on. All right call me back. Would you like to call somebody? About 300 guys I went to high school with. Hey, it’s me. I’m trppd in an ATM vstbl wth Jll Gdcr. I have no idea what you just said. Put Joey on the phone. He’s trapped in an ATM vestibule with Jill Goodacre! Like that thought never entered my mind. I’ll go. OK, senior year of college on a pool table. That’s my sister. My weirdest place would have to be the women’s room on the second floor of the New York City public library. What were you doing in a library? What about you? Milwaukee. It’s a really weird place. Disneyland, 1989, ‘It’s a Small World After All.’ No way! The ride broke down. So, Carol and I went behind a couple of those mechanical Dutch children… then they fixed the ride, and we were asked never to return to the Magic Kingdom. So that would leave…. I already went. You did not go! The weirdest place would have to be the foot of the bed. Step back. We have a winner! This must be what the fridge looks like with the door is closed. Spooky. We got a Klondike soup. I just never had a relationship with that kind of passion, where you have to have somebody right there, in the middle of a theme park. It was the only thing to do there that didn’t have a line. Barry wouldn’t even kiss me on a miniature golf course. He said we were holding up the people behind us. Do you think there are people who go through life never having that kind of… I’ll tell you something. Passion is way overrated. Eventually, it kind of burns out. But hopefully, what you’re left with is trust, and security, and in the case of my ex-wife, lesbianism. For all of those people who miss out on that passion thing, there’s all that other good stuff. I don’t think that’s going to be you. I see big passion in your future. It’s never gonna happen. You waited too long to make your move, and now you’re in the friend zone. I’m not in the zone. You’re mayor of the zone. I’m taking my time. I’m laying the groundwork. Every day I get just a little bit closer to Priesthood. I’m telling you, she has no idea what you’re thinking. She just ran her fingers through my hair. Were you missing that interaction? This is running fingers through your hair. Now this is a tousle. If you don’t ask her out soon you’re going to end up stuck in the zone forever. I’m waiting for the right moment. What’s messing you up? You’ve just got to go up to her and say, ‘Rachel, I think that…’ What are you shushing? We’re trying to hear something. Don’t you hear that? Would you like some gum? Is it sugarless? Then no thanks. What the hell was that? Mental note: If Jill Goodacre offers you gum, you take it. If she offers you mangled animal carcass, you take it. New York City has no power, and the milk is getting sour. But to me it is not scary, ‘cause I stay away from dairy. Here goes. Are you going to do it? I’m going to do it. Do you want any help? You come out there, you’re a dead man. Where are you going? You can’t go out there. Why not? Because of the reason. And that would be? I can’t tell you. What’s going on? You’ve got to promise that you’ll never, ever tell Ross that I told you. About what? He’s planning your birthday party. You’d better act surprised. He didn’t tell me. Don’t look at me. This is Ross’s thing. This is so typical. I’m always the last one to know everything. We tell you stuff. I was the last one to know when Chandler got bitten by the peacock at the zoo. I was the last one to know when you had a crush on Joey when he was moving in. Looks like I was second to last. You had a crush on me? It wasn’t a crush. It was a dent. You were moving your furniture upstairs. I thought you had nice arms. I’m moving the chair. Do anything for ya? With all the lights out, you can actually see the stars. I have a question. It’s not so much a question as more of a general wondering ment. For a while now, I’ve been wanting to… Look at the little cat! I’m on top of the world, looking down on creation and the only explanation I can find, is the wonders I’ve found ever since… This is just Bactine. It won’t hurt. Sorry, that was wax. Poor little Tooty is scared to death. We should find his owner. Why don’t we just put ‘poor little Tooty’ out in the hall? During a blackout? He’d get trampled! Damage control. Get back to the gum. On second thought, gum would be perfection. ‘Gum would be perfection’? ‘Gum would be perfection.’ Could have said ‘gum would be nice,’ or ‘I’ll have a stick,’ but no, no, no. For me, gum is perfection. I loathe myself. The Mendels, they hate all living things. We just found this cat and we’re looking for the owner. It’s mine. He seems to hate you. Are you sure? It’s my cat. Give me my cat. Wait a minute. What’s his name? You are a very bad man! You owe me a cat. Wanna go for a ride in my race car? I’ll bring my arms. That’d be nice. Then we could bring my wheelbarrow to carry your teeth. Everybody, this is Paolo. Paolo, I want you to meet my friends. He doesn’t speak much English. Where did Paolo come from? The cat turned out to be Paolo’s cat! Rachel keeps touching him. I looked all over the building and I couldn’t find the kitty anywhere. I found him. He was Paolo’s cat. There you go! Last to know again! I’m guessing since nobody told me this is Paolo. Let’s see. What next? Blow a bubble. A bubble’s good. It’s got a boyish charm, it’s impish. Here we go. Nice going, imp. All I need to do is reach over and put it back in my mouth. Good save! We’re back on track, and I’m chewing someone else’s gum. This is not my gum. And now you’re choking. You’re choking! That better? That was perfection. Now that was no tousle. What did he say that was so funny? I have absolutely no idea. That’s classic. What am I doing? This is so un-me! If you want, I’ll do it. I just want to bite his bottom lip. But I won’t. The first time he smiled at me those three seconds were more exciting than three weeks in Bermuda with Barry. Did you ride mopeds? It’s not about that right now. It’s totally superficial and we have nothing in common, and we don’t even speak the same language but God. Something you should know, Rachel and I are kind of a thing. You have the sex? Technically the sex is not being had, but that’s not the point. The point is that Rachel and I should be together. If you get in the way of us becoming a thing, then I would be very sad. You do know a little English. Do you know the word crapweasel? You are a huge crapweasel! We’ve been here for an hour doing this! Now watch, it’s easy. You’ve got to whip it. The last candle’s about to burn out. Kinda spooky without any lights. I have the definitive one. This probably isn’t the best time to bring it up, but you have to throw a party for Monica. This has been fun. Thanks for letting me use your phone and for saving my life. I had a great blackout. I’m account number 7143. I don’t know if you got any of that, but I would really like a copy of the tape.